Day 8

WV, MD, and PA roll out a Hero’s carpet.

If you want small and intimate…. don’t tell Melody.

Paco is speaking Seussian: I stink so bad my stink is stinky.

By JB Brostrom – Morning has broken in North Olmsted OH. We’re in one of Cleveland’s western suburbs. Wheels rolling is 6:30 am as we have a scheduled stop with a Hero who is 99 years old… and he shan’t wait. 5:30 am and Papa is waiting at the bikes for their caretaker.


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Apparently Lone Star needed a few more minutes of beauty sleep. It wasn’t too long after and Lone Star arose and gathered the windscreen cleaning supplies. He has asked for assistance, both Papa and GQ listened. The bikes all need a good wipe down as the dew was heavy this morning. You must never begin a day with a wet tush.

Soon after 6:00am the Mars’ Rover Rover crew along with the rest of the riders are milling about preparing for the early morning start. Keyser, West Virginia is the destination. We have an 11:30am meeting time at a spot about 16 miles north of town. Our day’s final destination us ultimately Glen Allen, VA / Richmond.

Today’s route will include the Ohio turnpike and thus the Pennsylvania turnpike necessitating tolls. Papa did research on PA and found it is a ride through state. Apparently they have acquired the technology to simply send you a bill. (Minority Report). Ohio still wants coins. This will be interesting on two wheels. Seems having one member of the group pay for the rest is disallowed. Perhaps the numbers are too staggering and Ohio tool workers cannot count that high. Certainly they cannot step out and pick up any fallen monies… it is more efficient to have the biker move forward, dismount, pick up themselves, pay, walk back to the bike, mount and depart. Apparently there is a third Mike, (remember Old Mike and New Mike?). We almost met Bad Mike.

The Pack let the Mars’ Rover Rover go ahead. 10 minutes later, right on time, the Pack rolled. About 10 minutes out we merged onto the Ohio Turnpike and were obligated to stop and grab a ticket to ride on a federally maintained highway that our federal tax dollars have already subsidized… this writer will never want to understand this… and extortion is illegal in most states? It is pronounced “Inter-State” not “Intra-State”! for the most part the tickets are grabbed and stored without incident and the Pack reconvened at a safe pull out area. Back in order Papa led them onto the Turnpike and east into PA. First…. we must exit Ohio and thus back into a tool plaza to be extorted for our departure. There is no TMZ video of Lone Star’s money drop but… it would have some epic eye contact and Bad Mike mumbling to be sure.

Back in formation the Pack rolls into PA. It is a cool morning with a few clouds spitting mist through the breaking sunlight causing horizon scenes right out of a painting. It was simply stunning as we rode east. The first PA extortion booth appears and the sights direct traffic to simply keep moving.. and we did. Soon we descended into a long shallow valley and Papa noticed the temps were not hovering in the low 60s. Papa also remembered that a few Pack members were in shirt sleeves as Cleveland was steamy. Up ahead is a pull out so Papa makes a quick decision to stop the group in this safe area.

Several of the riders are appreciative as they take the opportunity to properly dress for morning Pennsylvania riding. Slaw took the time for an impromptu bio stop. Back in formation the Pack rolled.

About 88 miles out the Mars’ Rover Rover is in our sights. The Pack rolls by and falls into formation in front. Now we’re whole again. About 140 miles out KFly motions that is non Harley with an inadequate fuel tank needs refilling. Papa finds an exit with a fuel station and the Pack rolls in for fuel and a bio stop. Time shows we’re ahead of schedule so we take the time to stretch legs, hydrate and witness Slaw take three Bio runs. Some things never change.

In order to get from the PA Turnpike to Keyser WV, the Pack will exit and travel county roads to merge onto free Interstate 68 for a couple of exits. This route, coupled with a bridge out detour, present the Pack with some of the most memorable riding beauty of the trip. The sleepy southern PA farm country was milling in and out of their respective Sunday services. The sight of this parade of Milwaukee metal (well one who wishes his were) and the sponsor adorned Mars’ Rover Rover caused some stunned and confused looks. The detour caused less time-loss than anticipated and the Pack rolled admiring the countryside. During this foray the Pack took a left hand turn on a small country road and quietly crossed into Maryland. About 5 miles farther and the Pack crossed under free Interstate 68 and onto the on-ramp. Papa slows to allow for the Mars’Rover Rover to rejoin and the Pack proceeds east on free

Interstate 68. We will be on this road for less than 10 miles before exiting into Cumberland Maryland. Our stop will be the parking lot for Buffalo Wild Wings… B-dubs for the bool people.

Without incident the Pack rolls into the empty parking area. Kickstands down for rest, hydration, Slaw’s continuing bio evacuation needs and the wait for our new friends from the PGR.

The Patriot Guard Riders is a volunteer organization of riders. Most are veterans, though it is not a requirement. They will ride to escort veterans and their surviving family members to their final resting place. They have also gained fame for protecting funeral attendees from the insane and asinine protesters.

When this group arrived the Pack was in awe. Apparently the call went out we needed assistance and was answered. We were hoping to parade by the home of one of the few, if any, remaining Tuskegee Airmen. Clifton E Brooks Sr. Is the grandfather (granddad) of one of our industry brethren, Melody. Paco suggested two years ago that we stop and meet this hero. This happened too late in our 2019 trip to make the logistics work.

Keyser WV is not on many direct routes. In 2020 full plans were laid out to make Keyser a fuel stop and thus meet Mr. Brooks. COVID halted these plans. The man just turned 99 years old so ANY plans must be made with contingencies. 2021 allowed the Pack to work with Melody and Clifton’s family to meet at the local Moose lodge and make the fuel stop a full meal stop…. and NO the Pack will not cater… The Books’ ladies will feed us and it is just not a discussable conversation! Yes ma’am.

Well, as these things often go with the Pack, the idea is a but a catalyst for something larger than self. This the few PGR riders meeting is back in Cumberland Maryland is now 30 ish members from three states. Many on trikes now that Father Time has lumbered on. We have bronze star recipients, Purple Heart recipients and a serious attitude of honor and dignity. The Pack, now about a quarter mile long in parade, begins the short ride to the north side of the Potomac to meet in the parking lot of the Chat – n Chew restaurant. OMG OMG OMG OMG. We’re greeted with a jam packed restaurant. 4 fire and and rescue vehicles, local police, county police, state police and local politicians not the mention 5 generations of Clifton’s family and friends. I’m not crying… are you crying? But.. best of all… this 99 year old Hero to his country and community and family is sitting in a Buick and will join in the parade in his honor!! Our little Pack parade to the Moose Lodge with intentions to wave at Clifton as we rode by have grown… Ms Melody and family go big or you go home!! They went BIG!

The logistics of this have grown and the humble little Patriots Pack with let the local officials guide and lead us. It is decided the law enforcement will shut down intersections and the fire vehicles will both lead and bring up the rear. They will be followed by Clifton’s auto, then some family vehicles then Lone Star’s Colonel Sanders, then the PGR, then the Pack, then one of Clifton’s family members on his motorcycle, then a rescue vehicle. And we’re off. The Parade for this Hero crosses the Potomac on the George Washington Memorial Bridge (the other one) and into Keyser West Virginia.

Our emotions were running wild and hearts racing. The slow moving parade continued through town. Shop keepers, families, passers by, locals stopped to honor this man. Some not even knowing what was happening. The route is to go all the way through town on the main drag and complete a loop in the Walmart parking lot, back onto the main drag back north and then into the Moose Lodge parking lot.

OMG OMG OMG, what a thrill to be part of this… to be part of the catalyst for this…. This writer is not really prone to Pack aggrandizing but this may never have happened if not for our want to simply ride in and meet this hiro. This seems criminal to me.

Note, why all the extended local, county and state police?? Seems the head local constable had refused our ask for help in guiding the Pack and a few PGR riders. It was not something he and his team could do. Well… the team of Ms Melody and the Mayor (perhaps National office next?!?) didn’t take no for an answer. I wonder how this gent’s next review will go? I am telling you, this town was locked down and came out like it was a Presidential visit! Actually it was much better.

In the parking lot of the Moose lodge the Pack and PGR were treated by Clifton’s incredible and LARGE family. Keeping the names and generational locations straight is not even possible so we won’t even try. Upon entering the Moose Lodge we were treated to an organized setup. The man is 99 so we have no time for lollygaging. The Pack has a special table reserved. Clifton’s and family have the head table. There is an order of events. The Pack will speak and present, then the PGR, then the family, then the Mayor and then a great-grandson will give a blessing of the food and then we will eat, then dessert, then photo ops then we leave.

Clifton is being very gracious and patient with those wanting photos and handshakes. I want his grip at 99!! Also, this fawning is nice and all but someone get this man some food!!!

Paco, the Judge and Papa made their way to the microphone and the ceremony began. Judge welcomed and thanked the gathering crowd. Papa presented Clifton’s and the family with a commemorative plaque from the Pack and Paco presented a classic 13 fold flag to Clifton’s and family. All very moving. The PGR then got to present a WWII memorial challenge coins and a plaque. This group was so very excited to have the rare gift to honor a living hero. Normally they present these tokens to a grieving widow or family member. So very exciting to have this opportunity to honor a true living Hero. A Tuskegee Airman. A Red Tail! This man is a Hero for so many reasons other than his wartime service to USA. Watching Clifton’s family’s pride in “granddad” has he is being honored is truly one of those moments in life that will never be forgotten.

Finally Mr. Mayor took the mic. This atypical politician spent most of his remarks on our guest of honor. It was refreshing to hear him apologize to Clifton and his family for never before honoring this man. He acknowledged the Patriots Pack for being the catalyst. Forever more there will be a Clifton Brooks’ day in Keyser West Virginia.

Hey Robin Roberts of Good Morning America…. your father was not the only Tuskegee Airman. Shame on you for ignoring the invitation to put a national spotlight onto Sunday’s festivities.

Alas it is time for the Pack to depart and make our way to Richmond VA. We have no evening appointments so we are not in a hurry. Just need a shower and a bed.

The PGR dudes gave the Pack very detailed instructions on how to get to Richmond. Very detailed…. Papa will take these instruction into consideration along with our normal GPS technology and, with confidence, will make our way to Richmond.

There is a scheduled fuel stop back at the Walmart turnaround on the south side of Keyser. It will be good to fuel up and let the our thoughts and emotions wash over us before having to concentrate on the road. Wow, want an experience in true, honest and real Americana.

Then reality hits as Papa rolls up to a pump. Seems the dude in the car assumes I took his spot and had mouthed his “concern” laced with some seemingly French or German deviations of slang. Dude, if is this important I will move on. So Papa toured the other pumps only to return to the original to find KFly has it occupied. Papa will be next. Our multi-cultural tinted window translator left to find a different filling station.

Where is the Mars’ Rover Rover? Ahhh spotted in the front entrance of Walmart restocking. Finally a refill of Gatorade but still no Double Stuffed Oreos???? Come on maaaaannnn…

The bad news is there is no easy way to get from Keyser WV to Richmond VA using Interstate highways. The good news is there is not way to get from Keyser WV to Richmond VA using interstate highways. The ride through the Virginias was magical. (Had to spell check Virginias three times). We have about 220 miles to go so we broke it into three one hour treks. The fist stop was to get a break from the heat and to wake up from our n apps. Napping on a motorcycle is frowned upon.

Back on the road the Pack was about to merge onto Interstate 81 north in Strassburg VA for just a few miles and then onto Interstate 66 east for a few miles before angling to Richmond. As thePack crossed over the Interstate and approaches the on-ramp it is apparent the north bound lane is dead sopped and a parking lot for miles and miles.

Papa aborts the on-ramp idea and needs into Strassburg looking for a safe place to pull over and have a detour campfire. Mission accomplished. We will m make a right at the lights and a left onto King street and then take the county roads east for a few miles. We have a plan to merge directly onto interstate 66 a few miles east and the plan comes together. Is is an interesting intersection. A very very wide right loop onto a city street or straight ahead and turn left. At the straight ahead Papa has realized the signage up above disallows a left turn from this lane on a green. This will cause an an issue with surface street u-turns for the bikes and the Mars’ Rover Rover. Make the illegal left and if questioned??? Claim Arizona ignorance and talk to my lawyer… Judge… in the RV. Left we proceeded without incident.

Onto I66 and off in a few miles and the PAck continued toward Richmond. The second stop was for fuel a stretch. The most direct route will take us east to Fredericksburg VA and onto Interstate 95 south for about 50 miles into Richmond. This goes off without a hitch. Once onto I95 we notice gain… parking lot style traffic on the north bound lane into Washington. Gridlock to get there and gridlock once there… not political just fact.

The Pack rolled into our hotel in Richmond. This is about or 6th year in a row. The gents out front remember us as they offer to move the cars and let us park, information, under the awning. Judge exits the Mars’ Rover Rover and heads to registration while the Pack parks.

Judge: “Hey Papa… they have no reservations for us!!!”

Papa: “Funny, leave us along and let us park!”

Judge: “No, seriously, they have no reservation!”

Papa: “@%#@#$% %^@$^@. W%^^$^”

Sure enough, a week ago Papa realized that online group reservations is not as efficient as individual reservations. So Papa called the front desk and explained the value of 30 room nights and make the reservation the old fashioned way. Then the front desk person that night, a week ago, booked the reservation…. in theory and waited to have the manager approve the 109 per night rate the next morning. Apparently that final step never happened.

Mr. Frond test guy, with the lovely personality. I have stinky, tired, and hungry guys and a an angry Jewish lawyer who thinks he is a Judge… let’s call Mr. General Manager and not wait until he arrives in the morning. We’re not all bunking in the Mars’ Rover Rover.

Mr. General Manager apparently had an aha moment of remembrance and in 5 minutes our room finally appeared with a new 89.00 per night rate. Problem solved without having to having to bring in Bad Mike.

It is a campfire night with three larger than last night’s but still not large, large pizzas and some sandwiches delivered. We must empty the Mars’ Rover Rover of beverages. The discussion of how and when to remove the Mars’ Rover Rover adornment begins. We have a retired but still on retainer, Senior director of shipping and logistics who is a former Stimulation Engineer, working on this project. We have no doubts about our ability to execute.

What a day. We have reached the furthers point of our journey but we have not yet completed our mission. Monday we will visit Cobb Technologies and have our annual celebratory dinner at Mama Cucina’s Restaurant…. stay tuned.

SOURCE Industry Analysts Inc.

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